My Beauty is a Curse – Gaijinhan

My Beauty is a Curse

A couple of years after I moved to Japan, my best friend R, was meeting girls on Skout and OkCupid. Occasionally, when he sees some cute girls or made some good friends, he would send me their pictures, and that got me interested in those apps (*simple-minded men*). So, eventually I got registered to both for a while but stopped using them not too much later.

Very occasionally, I would still receive texts from strangers mainly from the USA, the Philippines, France, Russia, and parts of Southeast Asia. So now I know where I should move to when I realize I may die a lonely man.

It’s been some many years since I last used the platform and recently, a lady from the USA texted me. Let’s call her Ms. USA. Long story short, we ended up meeting for dinner all of a sudden. So, it was our first (and only) meeting and she really surprised me. At first, she casually said she’s dated a number of guys this past year, and all of them,—let me repeat—all of them met her once and then blocked her from Line. She said she doesn’t know why and said maybe I could tell her after we meet.

No way I’m falling into that trap.

While waiting in line to get into the restaurant, she said she’s got no friends in Japan even though she’s been here for 2 years now. I found it odd so I probed, “Why?” And she replied, “My beauty is a curse.”

My beauty is a curse.

Ok, now I’m now gaining headway as to why the men she met in the past all disappeared after meeting her once.

She said she used to have a very good friend from Scotland, with whom she hangs out very frequently. But every time they are out, only Ms. USA gets hit on and so Ms. Scotland got jealous, it appears, and decided to cut all ties with Ms. USA. Hmm, odd story. Then she said how she used to hang out with this group of Korean and Japanese people. Among them, 3 of the Korean guys like her and she likes one of the Korean guys as well. Let’s call this guy Mr. Korea. But one fine day, Mr. Korea suddenly texted Ms. USA to tell her that the other 2 Korean guys who like her want to do something bad to her, so she had better stop hanging out with them. For her own safety, Ms. USA did as told and stopped hanging out with them. But as she liked Mr. Korea, she wanted to continue hanging out with him. To her surprise, Mr. Korea told her, “No, I don’t think we should meet anymore.” Odd story 2.

All these while she was dressed in her pink top, with a pink ribbon, pink watch, pink shoes, and carrying a pink backpack. I asked, “Why are you carrying a bag? Didn’t you come from home?” And she replied as-a-matter-of-factly, “Just in case I can’t go home tonight and have to stay out, so I have all my stuff in the bag.”

I wasn’t sure if I was going to get lucky or unlucky.

When we got seated in the restaurant tucking into the delicious fare, I noticed she didn’t touch the grated yam, which I specifically asked if she takes before placing the order. So maybe she didn’t catch what I was asking and I asked, “Do you not like yam or are you allergic to it?” Ms. USA said, “Oh no, I’m not allergic to it. The only thing I’m allergic to is peanuts, so if you intend to kiss me, please do not eat peanuts before that.”

And I thought, “Er… ok, peanuts shall be my staple food from now.”

As I told her I’ve still got work to be done that night, I managed to escape left before she could gobble me up 10 pm. As I waved her goodbye, she asked, “Do people in Singapore hug?” My spider sense activated and I asked, “You want to go for the hug?” She asked, “Is that ok?” And I said, “Sure, why not?” But as she wrapped both her arms around me, I felt like I was being twisted by an anaconda. Her grip was so strong, I thought I was going to die from asphyxiation.

After that we parted ways, I got home and delete my OkCupid account.

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