Many many years ago, long enough for my incapable memory to not remember when, I watched a talk show featuring a Singaporean couple. Husband and wife to be exact. They have a child who’s mostly with either of the couple’s parents. Some of you might be surprised at that choice but what the wife said later made so much sense.
Someday, your child is going to grow up and leave you for their family. The only person that’s going to spend the rest of their life with you for the rest of your life is your spouse, so it makes more sense to put more effort in maintaining a strong relationship with your other half than neglect them for your child.
You may or may not agree, but I do. Of course they don’t have to be mutually exclusive, but unfortunately, it seems many people do let either exclude the other.
I’ve met many married people who have children and no longer sleep with their spouse. This is, most unfortunate, a typical Japanese family. The husband ends up spending all his time at work and drinking after knocking off, spending barely any time with his family. All in the name of “for the family.” So what happens when they want to have another child? The husband probably goes over to have sex with the wife. Every other day, they sleep apart. This sounds twisted to me as it appears as though the wife is nothing but a baby-making sex machine who helps raise the child and tidy up the house. The husband helps create the baby so that the wife has got something to do while he’s away.
It’s like a harem. Of one woman.